《不可儿戏》开篇：英文原著带中文翻译

Morning-room in Algernon’s flat in Half-Moon Street. The room is luxuriously and artistically furnished. The sound of a piano is heard in the adjoining room.

半月街阿尔杰农公寓的晨间起居室。室内陈设奢华而富有艺术气息。隔壁房间传来钢琴声。

[Lane is arranging afternoon tea on the table, and after the music has ceased, Algernon enters.]

［莱恩在桌上摆放下午茶，音乐停止后，阿尔杰农上。］

ALGERNON. Did you hear what I was playing, Lane?

阿尔杰农：莱恩，你听见我刚才弹的曲子了吗？

LANE. I didn’t think it polite to listen, sir.

莱恩：先生，我觉得偷听不太礼貌。

ALGERNON. I’m sorry for that, for your sake. I don’t play accurately—any one can play accurately—but I play with wonderful expression. As far as the piano is concerned, sentiment is my forte. I keep science for Life.

阿尔杰农：为你着想，我很遗憾。我弹得不准确，谁都能弹得准确，可我弹得极富表现力。就钢琴而言，情感是我的专长。我把科学留给生活。

LANE. Yes, sir.

莱恩：是，先生。

ALGERNON. And, speaking of the science of Life, have you got the cucumber sandwiches cut for Lady Bracknell?

阿尔杰农：说到生活这门科学，给布拉克内尔夫人准备的黄瓜三明治切好了吗？

LANE. Yes, sir. [Hands them on a salver.]

莱恩：切好了，先生。［用托盘递上。］

ALGERNON. [Inspects them, takes two, and sits down on the sofa.] Oh! . . . by the way, Lane, I see from your book that on Thursday night, when Lord Shoreman and Mr. Worthing were dining with me, eight bottles of champagne are entered as having been consumed.

阿尔杰农：［查看三明治，拿了两块，在沙发上坐下。］哦！……顺便说一句，莱恩，我从你的账本上看到，星期四晚上肖尔曼勋爵和沃辛先生与我共进晚餐时，记着喝掉了八瓶香槟。

LANE. Yes, sir; eight bottles and a pint.

莱恩：是的，先生，八瓶零一品脱。

ALGERNON. Why is it that at a bachelor’s establishment the servants invariably drink the champagne? I ask merely for information.

阿尔杰农：为什么在单身汉的宅子里，仆人总要喝香槟呢？我只是问问，想弄个明白。

LANE. I attribute it to the superior quality of the wine, sir. I have often observed that in married households the champagne is rarely of a first-rate brand.

莱恩：先生，我把这归因于酒的质量上乘。我常常注意到，在结了婚的人家里，香槟很少是一流品牌的。

ALGERNON. Good heavens! Is marriage so demoralising as that?

阿尔杰农：天哪！婚姻竟让人堕落到这种地步吗？

LANE. I believe it is a very pleasant state, sir. I have had very little experience of it myself up to the present. I have only been married once. That was in consequence of a misunderstanding between myself and a young person.

莱恩：先生，我相信婚姻是非常愉快的状态。到目前为止，我本人对此经验甚少。我只结过一次婚。那是我和一位年轻人之间的一场误会造成的。

ALGERNON. [Languidly.] I don’t know that I am much interested in your family life, Lane.

阿尔杰农：［懒洋洋地。］莱恩，我对你的家庭生活恐怕不太感兴趣。

LANE. No, sir; it is not a very interesting subject. I never think of it myself.

莱恩：是的，先生，这不是一个很有趣的话题。我自己从来不去想它。

ALGERNON. Very natural, I am sure. That will do, Lane, thank you.

阿尔杰农：我相信这很自然。就这样吧，莱恩，谢谢你。

LANE. Thank you, sir. [Lane goes out.]

莱恩：谢谢您，先生。［莱恩下。］

ALGERNON. Lane’s views on marriage seem somewhat lax. Really, if the lower orders don’t set us a good example, what on earth is the use of them? They seem, as a class, to have absolutely no sense of moral responsibility.

阿尔杰农：莱恩对婚姻的看法似乎有些松懈。说真的，如果下层阶级不给我们树立好榜样，他们到底还有什么用呢？作为一个阶级，他们似乎完全没有道德责任感。

[Enter Lane.]

［莱恩上。］

LANE. Mr. Ernest Worthing.

莱恩：欧内斯特·沃辛先生到。

[Enter Jack.]

［杰克上。］

[Lane goes out.]

［莱恩下。］

ALGERNON. How are you, my dear Ernest? What brings you up to town?

阿尔杰农：你好吗，亲爱的欧内斯特？什么风把你吹进城来了？

JACK. Oh, pleasure, pleasure! What else should bring one anywhere? Eating as usual, I see, Algy!

杰克：哦，寻欢作乐，寻欢作乐！不然人还能为什么事进城呢？我看你还是照常吃个不停，阿尔吉！

ALGERNON. [Stiffly.] I believe it is customary in good society to take some slight refreshment at five o’clock. Where have you been since last Thursday?

阿尔杰农：［冷淡地。］我相信上流社会的习惯是五点钟稍微吃点东西。从上星期四起你一直去哪儿了？

JACK. [Sitting down on the sofa.] In the country.

杰克：［在沙发上坐下。］在乡下。

ALGERNON. What on earth do you do there?

阿尔杰农：你在那儿到底做什么？

JACK. [Pulling off his gloves.] When one is in town one amuses oneself. When one is in the country one amuses other people. It is excessively boring.

杰克：［脱下手套。］人在城里就自己寻开心。人在乡下就逗别人开心。这无聊透顶。

ALGERNON. And who are the people you amuse?

阿尔杰农：那你逗哪些人开心呢？

JACK. [Airily.] Oh, neighbours, neighbours.

杰克：［轻描淡写地。］哦，邻居，邻居。

ALGERNON. Got nice neighbours in your part of Shropshire?

阿尔杰农：你在什罗普郡那一带有好邻居吗？

JACK. Perfectly horrid! Never speak to one of them.

杰克：讨厌极了！我从不跟他们任何人说话。

ALGERNON. How immensely you must amuse them! [Goes over and takes sandwich.] By the way, Shropshire is your county, is it not?

阿尔杰农：那你一定把他们逗得开心极了！［走过去拿三明治。］顺便问一句，什罗普郡是你的郡，对吧？

JACK. Eh? Shropshire? Yes, of course. Hallo! Why all these cups? Why cucumber sandwiches? Why such reckless extravagance in one so young? Who is coming to tea?

杰克：嗯？什罗普郡？是的，当然。嘿！怎么摆这么多杯子？怎么有黄瓜三明治？这么年轻的人怎么如此挥霍无度？谁要来喝茶？

ALGERNON. Oh! merely Aunt Augusta and Gwendolen.

阿尔杰农：哦！只是奥古斯塔姑妈和格温多琳。

JACK. How perfectly delightful!

杰克：那真是太好了！

ALGERNON. Yes, that is all very well; but I am afraid Aunt Augusta won’t quite approve of your being here.

阿尔杰农：是啊，那当然好，可我怕奥古斯塔姑妈不太赞成你在这儿。

JACK. May I ask why?

杰克：请问为什么？

ALGERNON. My dear fellow, the way you flirt with Gwendolen is perfectly disgraceful. It is almost as bad as the way Gwendolen flirts with you.

阿尔杰农：老兄，你跟格温多琳调情的样子实在太不像话了。几乎跟格温多琳跟你调情的样子一样糟糕。

JACK. I am in love with Gwendolen. I have come up to town expressly to propose to her.

杰克：我爱上了格温多琳。我专程进城来向她求婚。